mixed day part 2

after installing the stupid atuocad for kevin.. i decide to write me blog before i go shower..
and so.. i goto justins blog..... f...m...l...
hes acutally thinking about moving to diamond bar..
i dont want him to go.. he cant go..
but hten again.. he can.. he sounds like hes gonna be happier there...
i guess i shouldnt be too selfish...
but justin han..
if u leave.....
what am i gonna do....
the cuties arent gonna be a collective anymore.
its just gonna be kevin and jeremy...
tahts nto the cuties :(
tahts lik.. cutie +1
:(
sigh...
and u noe wat...
now that things are so much more complicated with eddie :(
who am i gonna talk to if not u..
and whos gonna be the silly boy who always cheers me up and makes blunt statements like "oh its ok just fuck them"
sigh.....
and whos gonna be the silly boy who doesnt understand anything about anything..
WHOS GONNA BE MY FOB BUDDY WHO CANT SPELL AND DOESNT GET ANYTHING :(
sigh....
justin han :( i dont want u to go..
u make my senior year almost bearable.......

this managed.. to completely bring me down....
and i was telling earlier too...
today was the closest ive been to being as happy as i have been since last yyear...

sigh whos gonna lean on me walking half way to chemistry...
who am i gonna rant to randomly about stupid things that i just dont trust ppl with...
and who am i gonna lean on when im tired...or when ijust feel like it (scratch that..eddies there)
or... eat my seafood ramen (although im pretty sure everyone would...)
or.. iono.. everything else....
and u havent even packed me lunch like u said u would...
its not like u promised u'd stay..
but man :(
i hate it when things like this happen :( especially when this happens to close friends..
and its not like i can ask u to stay cuz im not in any position to tell u that..
and its not like i can ask u to just leave cuz its gonna make me sad...
and its not like theres any easy way out of this for anyone....
and its not like its easy for me with eddies stupid crap...

my life sucks....
and my quote stays true...
"happiness is evil... its presence is the precursor to more devastating pain"

the hell... am i supposed to do....

i want out....
out of all of this